Saturday, September 2, 2017

You''l Never Convince Me.....

    I've always loved the Sunday funnies. When I was a kid, one of the strips featured in the paper was Ripley's Believe It or Not!  which depicted weird and wonderful facts(?).  Well some things we believe readily, other things we're like yeah, yeah! It intrigues me how people will ignore mountains of evidence on one subject and swallow a crock of BS on another.  How we can dismiss volumes of research out-of-hand on one topic, yet accept a blurry photograph or nonsensical anecdote as proof positive for another.
      That is to say, we don't demand the same level of proof for every claim. We judge by different criteria! Often, if a person only asserts a claim with enough confidence and sincerity as if he believes it himself, that's good enough. Someone we trust said so, so we accept it. At other times we're like Thomas of old, who refused to believe Christ was risen from the dead until he could confirm it for himself.
    So today let's have a little fun. At the risk of offending every member of my fan base (both of you), here is  a list of claims my legendary open-mindedness simply cannot and will not concede. You'll never convince me....
  The Earth is flat. Even if NASA really is lying about everything they say, so what? The Earth was round long before NASA was created. One word, folks: longitude.  Lines of latitude slice the earth up like a tomato, while longitude divides it up like orange wedges. Thus on an orange-shaped earth, longitude lines converge at both the North and South poles, being furthest apart at the Equator.  But on a pizza planet, they get farther and farther apart the further south you venture, being their widest distance apart at the "crust" i.e. the Antarctic.
   Follow me? Thus we would expect more discrepancy between the false model and reality in the Southern Hemisphere, particularly in the upper latitudes. Ships and planes would be getting stranded all the time because their globe tells them it's only a thousand miles from here to there when really it's three thousand. So we would expect more Flat Earthers from Australia where their GPS's would be getting them lost more. 'Cuz folks, people would notice the maps were all wrong by now. Can I get a "DUH!"?
   There are Reptilians among us. A race of aliens that can disguise themselves as human and run the world? The amazing proof of this is in the fact that HD videos occasionally pixelate, causing the pupils of world leaders' eyes appear to shape-shift from round to slitted. Listen guys, I am 99.99% certain that when Jesus Christ called the Pharisees and Saducees a "generation of vipers" , He was speaking metaphorically about their moral character, not literally about their genetic make-up. This is mass hysteria, or if you prefer, a psy-op. Either way, it ain't real.
   We evolved by chance. What has evolved is the Theory of Evolution, which gets a make-over every century or so. Paleontologists have discovered a race of ancient human beings called archaic Homo Sapiens, which existed long before the little monkey folk we allegedly evolved from. This would mean man evolved, went extinct for an age or two, then evolved again. Uh-huh, yeah. The chances of us evolving once were a bazillion to one, and you expect me to believe we evolved twice???  Newsflash: even if some prehistoric ape was born with a mutation that gave him a speech center in his brain, he still would never learn to talk. This is because that part of our brains won't develop right unless we hear someone speaking to us while we're little. Without someone to speak to little Bright-Eyes, his Broca's area would never, could never be able to process speech. With no one to stimulate his growing brain, he would remain dumb. And before you tell me language itself evolved, the truth is ancient languages were far more complex than our modern ones. Like everything else, language is devolving.
   There is no God. I don't care if the so-called Smartest Man in the World says God is just a delusion. God says He's real, and I believe Him! I didn't go looking for God, He came after me. Why He'd bother with a POS like me, I'll never know. Jesus said "No man can come to Me unless the Father draws him." If you haven't met Him, you may well think it's a myth or fairy tale. But if He's revealed Himself to you, there's nothing anyone can say nor do to make you deny Him. I don't care who thinks I'm stupid, I don't care who thinks I'm crazy!
   Tell me all your psychobabble, your pseudoscientific mumbo-jumbo, blahblahblah, I don't care! I know that my Redeemer lives. I have believed, and therefore have I spoken: I believe God created the heavens and the earth, I believe the Bible is His word, and I believe Jesus Christ is His only-begotten Son and my only Saviour.  And you'll never convince me otherwise.