Sunday, October 2, 2016

Shattered Portraits

 When you look in the mirror, what do you see?
 A few imperfections: a pimple here, an age spot there, your nose hair or eyebrows need a trim? Oh, is that a blackhead?
   "As many were astonished at thee: His visage was so marred more than any man, and His form more than the sons of men; so shall He startle many nations..."  
   The prophet Isaiah foresaw Christ's sufferings on the cross and tells us His tormentors messed up His face so bad He didn't even look like a person! The Gospel writers show us His accusers punched Him, beat Him with rods, and forced a crown of thorns down on His head all the while they mocked Him. 
   Isaiah writes again, "I gave My back to the smiters, and My cheeks to them that plucked off the hair: I hid not My face from shame and spitting." (Isaiah 50:6). They tore His beard right off His face!!! He looked like a monster!
   Why am I telling you this?
   King David also had a vision in which he experienced  Christ's agony on the cross, recorded in the 22nd Psalm. "But I am a worm, and no man; a reproach of men, and despised of the people. All that see Me laugh Me to scorn..."
   "Reproach" isn't a word we use much these days, but it means you are the butt of peoples' jokes, the object of their contempt. They whisper about you, look down on you, judge you and brand you as inferior. 
   You're fat. You're ugly. You're stupid. You're retarded. You're gay. You're a loser. You're a wimp. You're  poor. You're illegitimate. You're worthless.
   Many of us have had moments in our lives when we were either told such things straight out or made to feel that way by a parent, sibling, classmate, relative, whoever. And you internalize the reproach, and turn it inward on yourself.  You have a broken image of yourself. "I am a worm and no man."
   I recall an event in my life that marked me. It was my birthday (5th or 6th?) and in cards from relatives and family friends I got some cash, about $9.00.  I remember my father telling me, "That's too much for you", leaving me $2.00 and taking the rest. I forgive him, but damn! He told me essentially I didn't deserve nine dollars! It was too much for me!
   I went through my life feeling like I didn't deserve good things, didn't have a right to expect or ask for anything for me! I never finished college, and took low-paying jobs, driving second-hand cars and dressing like a bum and never knowing why I sabotaged my life. I didn't recall it until after much prayer and seeking the Lord, but that one moment defined my view of myself.
   Why am I telling you this?  But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities. The chastisement of our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed. Surely He has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows. Why did God let them do that to His Son? TO UNDO IT IN YOU!
  Listen, I'm not talking about some warm fuzzy feel good about yourself chicken soup for the soul. I'm talking about the God Who Sees Me looking deep into your heart and soul and taking that moment that filled you with shame and fear and self-loathing and putting it on the cross for His Son to bear it for you!!!
   His visage was so marred so that your image of yourself can be restored. He came to make the crooked things straight and the rough places plane. For this purpose was the Son of God manifested, that He might destroy  the works of the Devil. (1 John 3:8) Jesus Christ came to destroy whatever evil things Satan and his demons worked in you. Whatever crap the devil  dumped on you while you were a child, or a teen, to break you up inside, JESUS WANTS TO TAKE AWAY.
    Jesus came to heal the broken-hearted. Listen, you don't earn any points with God by suffering pain and misery. Jesus did the suffering for you. You earn points with God by believing what He said and acting like it.  In the 12th chapter of Hebrews, we are encouraged, "Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us."
   You've carried that weight and worn that label long enough! Let Jesus heal your heart and soul deep within where nobody else sees. Just give it to Him!
Peace!

  

Sunday, September 25, 2016

Message for Babylon....(Forward)

   The following is an excerpt from the Fifty-First chapter of the Book of Jeremiah. I have pulled references to "Babylon", and forwarded the message to the United States. If the shoe fits, wear it.
Thus says the LORD; Behold, I will raise up against America, and against them that dwell in the midst of them that rise up against Me, a destroying wind; and will send to America fanners, that shall fan her, and shall empty her land; for in the day of trouble they shall be against her round about. Against him that bends let the archer bend his bow, against him that lifts up himself in his brigandine: and spare her not her young men; destroy ye utterly all her host. Thus the slain shall fall in the land of the Yanks, and they that are thrust through in her streets......Flee out of the midst of America, and deliver every man his soul: be not cut off in her iniquity; for this is the time of the LORD's vengeance; He will render unto her a recompence.  America has been a golden cup in the LORD's hand, that made all the earth drunken; the nations have drunken of her wine; therefore the nations are mad. The U.S. is suddenly fallen and destroyed; howl for her; take balm for her pain, if so be she may be healed. We would have healed America,  but she is not healed: forsake her, and let us go every one into his own country: for her judgement reaches unto Heaven, and is lfted up even to the skies. 
Make bright the arrows, gather the shields;  the LORD has raised up the spirit of the kings of the Medes:  for his device is against America, to destroy it; because it is the vengeance of the LORD, the vengeance of His temple. Set up a standard upon the walls of America, make the watch strong, set up the watchmen, prepare the ambushes: for the LORD hath both devised and done that which He spake against the inhabitants of the United States.
O you who dwell upon many waters, abundant in treasures, thine end is come, and the measure of your covetousness. The LORD of hosts has sworn by Himself, saying, "Surely  I will fill thee with men, as with locusts, and they shall lift up a victory shout against you,
And I will render unto the U.S. and to all the inhabitants of America all their evil that they have done, says the LORD. Behold, I am against you, O destroying mountain," says the LORD, "which destroys all the earth; and I will stretch out My hand upon you, and roll you down from the rocks, and will make you a burnt mountain."  Set ye up a standard in the land, blow the trumpet among the nations, prepare the nations against her.....appoint a captain against her, cause the horses to come up like the locusts!
And the land shall tremble and sorrow, for every purpose of the LORD  shall be performed against Amerca, to make America a desolation, without an inhabitant. The mighty men of America have forborne to fight; they have remained in their holds: their might has failed; they became as women: they have burned her dwelling-places; her bars are broken.
 One post shall run to meet another, and one messenger to meet another, to show the President of the United States that his city is taken at one end, and the passages are stopped, and the reeds they have burned with fire, and the men of war are affrighted.
For thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel:  The daughter of America is like a threshingfloor, it is time to thresh her: yet a little while, and the time of her harvest shall come.
How is Washington taken! and how is the praise of the whole earth surprised! How is America become an astonishment among the nations! The sea is come up upon America: she is covered with the multitude of the waves thereof.....Therefore, the days come, that I will do judgement upon the graven images of America: and her whole land shall be confounded.
Though America mounts up to space, and though she should fortify the height of her strength, yet from Me shall spoilers come unto her, says the LORD. A sound of a cry comes from America, and great destruction from the land of the Americans: because the LORD has spoiled America, and has destroyed out of her the great voice....Thus says the LORD of hosts, the broad walls of the U.S. shall be broken, and her high gates shall be burned with fire; and the people shall labor in vain, and the folk in the fire, and they shall be weary.

   I know most people won't believe such a thing could happen here, nor that God would judge us. Many of you will be angry at me for even suggesting such a thing! Some of you will hate me. But no empire lives forever, and every great civilization comes to an end. Our day is coming, don't be surprised when it happens.

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

Whatever Happened to Eternal Life?

In hope of eternal life, which God, That cannot lie, promised before the world began;   Titus 1:2

   When was the last time anyone spoke to you of eternal life?
   At one time it was the main focus of the Church and the heart of the Gospel. But now the Church has a new message, that, hey,  let's make life comfortable in the here & now. So now it's prosperity seminars, marriage conferences, Men's movements, and youth camps. Others seek to unlock prophecy and explain how today's headlines fulfill Scripture. Some focus only on this evil world system, and exposing all their evil deeds.
   Now I'm not saying these things aren't good or necessary (and of course each servant of Christ must minister the things God has called him to!), but why aren't we telling the world "The gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord" ?
   We are told in the Gospel of Matthew that a fellow came to Jesus and asked, "Good Master, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life?"  It seems at one time the guy on the street was interested in obtaining eternal life; why not now? In our culture, there are several schools of thought on post-mortem existence. 
   Some believe there is no life past death, but once your brain shuts down for good, you're mind shuts down as well: there is only oblivion. Others hold to the notion that your soul or spirit dwells here on earth among your loved ones. Many believe in reincarnation, endless cycles of life and death. Finally there are those who suppose that all mankind, good or evil, ascend to heaven and are welcomed into the presence of God equally.
   But God, Who cannot lie, promised eternal life to those who believe in the foolishness of preaching; the preaching that Christ died for our sins, according to the Scriptures, and was buried, and rose again the third day, according to the Scriptures. If there is no life beyond the grave, then God lied. Or if everybody gets eternal life, then why did He promise it? Why promise me what's mine already?
   But the Bible makes it clear, that there is not only eternal life for some, but eternal death for many others, saying in Daniel, "And many of them that sleep in the dust of the earth shall awake, some to everlasting life, and some to shame and everlasting contempt."  Now I've heard it said by many that "a loving God would never send anyone to Hell".  Well, neither would He force those who hate Him to hang around with Him forever.  And He certainly wouldn't force those who were all their lifetimes abused, exploited, oppressed, and tormented by the ungodly to spend the rest of eternity among them!
   It may not be fashionable these days to talk about Hell as a real place, but the spirits of those who lived wickedly will be condemned and punished. The prevailing theory or feeling in our culture now is that there are many paths to God.  Well, whatever path we take, we are all going to stand before His throne to be judged of Him. If ya wanna go there.
   But who thinks they're good enough? Do you??? I sure ain't! And no matter which path you trod, your feet are still too dirty to enter His presence.
   Hello! God, Who cannot lie, promised eternal life, and this life is in His Son. Jesus said, "I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in Me, though he were dead, yet shall he live; and whosoever liveth and believeth in Me shall never die."  (John 11:25-26)
   Remember the dude with the rainbow wig at the football games holding up a sign about JOHN 3:16? He made a fool of himself to get out this message of eternal life, that  God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, so that whosoever believes on Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. 
That's God's promise, and it's open to anybody and everybody, but not everyone will accept it. Will you?

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Pick a Side??

   Pick a side! We are constantly encouraged by the media,the establishment, the press, and social media to align ourselves with one side or the other! Left Twix or right Twix? (like there's a difference.) Batman or Superman? NFC or AFC? Iron Man  or Captain America? Pick a side! Bernie or Hillary? OOOPS! Trump or Hillary? Black or white? Gay or straight? Cops or protestors? Werewolves or vampires? Cats or dogs? Gun control or gun rights? Oh, you've got to pick a side! There's no room for neutrality these days.
   So why must we divide over such things? Who benefits? Whether Batman wins, or Superman wins, DC wins. And whether Cap wins or Iron Man wins, Marvel wins. Whether AFC or NFC, the NFL wins. And whether the Yankees or Red Sox win, MLB wins. So, the red pill or the blue one? Like Twix, is it really a choice at all?  Seems like whoever sets up the rivalries is the real winner, doesn't it?
   Now I'm not saying you can't or shouldn't have favorites; that's just human nature. But more and more, we're being urged to draw a line in the sand and choose one side or the other. They all talk about unity, but sell polarization.
   Well, throughout the ages, God also demands man to pick a side. Moses challenged his people, "I call Heaven and earth to record  this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live."  Deuteronomy 30:19. Also before his death, Joshua enjoined the Israelites, "...choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers servedt hat were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell; but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD." Joshua 24:15.
   Jump ahead to the days of the divided kingdom, as Elijah confronts the false prophets of Jezebel, he reminds the people it's time to pick a side: "How long halt ye between two opinions? if the LORD be God, follow Him; but if Baal, then follow him." 1 Kings 18:21.
Christ Himself insisted there is no middle ground between the love of money and the love of God, saying, "No man can have two masters; for either he will hate the one,and love the other, or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon." Matthew 6:24
   The Apostle Paul put it in black & white when he wrote to the Church at Corinth, "But I say, that the things which the Gentiles sacrifice, they sacrifice to devils and not to God; and I would not that you should have fellowship with devils. Ye cannot drink the cup of the Lord, and the cup of devils: ye cannot be partakers of the Lord's table, and of the table of devils. Do we provoke the Lord to jealousy?Are we stronger than he?"  1 Corinthians 10:20-22
   Bob Dylan echoed, " you're gonna have to serve someone. It may be the devil, or it may be the Lord, but you're gonna hafta serve someone." Why must we choose? Because by not choosing, you've already chosen. There is a default. If you don't deliberately choose God, you implicitly choose the devil. We're already on the Highway to Hell, and that's where we'll stay unless we choose to take the next exit!
   I mean, do you have to teach a child to lie, or to tell the truth? He'll lie all on his own! Do you have to teach him to bite other kids and pull their hair, or must you teach him not to? He can do bad all by himself! Need you teach him to hoard his toys or to share them?  Must you teach him to steal, or to respect others' property? Sin is in our DNA!
   Some will say, "I don't want God or the Devil". Nice try.  But Christ declared, "He that is not  with Me is against Me."  Those are your choices. Concerning Jesus Christ, the Gospel of John says, "He came unto His own, and His own received Him not. But as many as received Him,  to them gave He power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on His name."
   There is the kingdom of darkness, and the kingdom of light. Pick a side.

Sunday, June 26, 2016

Changing Times, Eternal Message

"Christ came into the world to save sinners"
   Awhile back, TV ads declared that orange juice was "simply unfooled around with". Today, I'm going to simply unfool around with the Gospel message and give it to ya the way we used to! Like we preached it back in our street-witnessing days along the New Haven Green, around about  the Yale  campus and up & down Captain Thomas Boulevard in West Haven CT! In case you never heard it like I heard it!
   First of all, who or what is a "sinner" ? A sinner is anyone and everyone who knowingly or unwittingly disobeys God's rules. We're not singling out one group here folks, as the Good Book puts it, "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."  We all missed the mark of God's standards.
 OK, so what is Christ come to save us sinners from? Going to Hell for the rest of forever? Well YEAH! (Hell is a place or dimension where peope who don't want anything to do with God, and don't want Him telling them what they can't or shouldn't do, go to find out how damned stupid they are.) But more than this, Christ came to save you  from whatever is beating you up right now in this life!
"The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me, because He has anointed  { or empowered} Me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised, to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord."  (Luke 4:18)
   That is, Jesus' mission on this planet is to set people like you and me free from bondages of addictions, fears, guilt, depression, torment and suffering, and feelings of worthlessness, defeat, rejection and failure.  This isn't just a feel-good warm/fuzzy gospel, but real change in your life: from victim to victor. He's not just an emotional crutch, but a whole new set of legs.
   The simple Gospel is that Christ died for our sins, the Just for the unjust. Even as notable thief, murderer, terrorist, and all-around scumbag Barabbas was let go and Christ crucified, so it is with us when we accept God's offer of amnesty. Our Father God will not only delete all the negative stuff from your account with Him, He'll actually credit  His Son's perfect score to your account. 
   And what is He asking of you? Only believe. Believe that God sent His only Son to die on that cross for you and raised Him again from the dead. Don't I gotta clean up my act first?  Really as soon as you realize and admit  you need to clean up your life, He'll clean you up in ways you yourself never could.
   "Therefore if the Son of God shall make you free, you shall be free indeed."  Jesus said. As one who's been emancipated myself, I can tell you it's not hype, not a cliche', and not a sales pitch. I'm not trying to get you to join a church, denomination, nor religion; just letting you know what God is putting on the table.
   Now I know many believe in reincarnation and working out your own karma. But even if that were so, (and the Bible says it's not)  are you gonna turn Christ down when He offers you a GET OUT OF JAIL, FREE card? "The law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has made me free from the law of sin and death" the Scripture tells us. There's a way off that downward spiral, that crazy merry-go-'round.
  It may not be fashionable these days to proclaim The wages of sin is death, but that's the way it is. (I never was a fashion follower.) Of course the second part of that quote (Romans 6:23) goes, "but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."  And that's what we're talking about (or should be). God is offering you the gift of eternal life with Him,  " remission of sins", that is, dropping the charges against you, and supernatural power to turn you loose from whatever things have got a hold of you now. And He's just waiting for you to say, "Let's do this".
   Why am I taking the time to express this? I'm not sure modern preachers are telling you the story straight. There's been some dumbing down, watering down, and softening up over the years. Some churches wanna be "seeker friendly"  and not offend anybody.  But the Gospel doesn't need any updating, and it sure doesn't need any sugar-coating.
   I just want to make sure you hear it the way I heard it many years ago. A million, million things have changed since back then, but God never changes.  His offer still stands: come to Christ and live.
'til next time, Peace.

Sunday, June 12, 2016

Mandela Effect for Dummy's, um, Dummies

   When the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on the earth? asks Christ in His parable of the unjust judge. Well, my friends something has come along that is the very antithesis of faith! What is the Christ kind of faith? Believing what you don't see? Yes, but more than that!
 All things are possible to him who believes Christ taught His disciples, saying, "If you had faith as little as a grain of mustard seed, you would say to this mountain, 'Be removed!' and it would obey you."
   Paul speaks of the faith of Abraham who believed God, Who makes the dead alive and calls those things that be not as if they were. (Romans 4:17) In the Book of Hebrews we are told that faith is the evidence of things not seen. Now I'm taking the time to go over what Biblical faith is in order to show you that what's going around today is the exact opposite!
   Let's compare the Mandela Effect and Flat Earth assertions with New Testament faith. God calls those things that be not as though they were, calling Abraham "Father of many nations" even when he and Sarah were too old to have children. Mandela  calls those things that be as though they were not, saying "that's not the way we remember it!" Christ taught that if you believe, all things are possible to him who believes. Antichrist teaches everything you believe is a lie. Oh, no! The earth isn't a spinning ball! The Sun isn't 93 million miles away! There are no planets! There never were any dinosaurs!
   That's a huge difference, folks! The Bible says faith is the evidence of things not seen; "truthers" say the evidence of things that are seen is false! Christ taught that we can change the world through the Word of God; Antichrist teaches we have chaged the word of God with the world. Flat Earth and Mandela Effect are nothing more than the spirit of antichrist's perversion and inversion of FAITH.  And Christians need to stop teaching and preaching this junk.
   Flat Earthers and Mandelians are unwitting pawns and tools of the wicked rulers of this age (I don't use the I-word, which is a misnomer). You are proclaiming the very concept the evil elite want the public to accept: that we are living in an artificial world created and run by an evil tyrant, whose yoke we must throw off. This story is the central theme of such movies as Pleasantville, The Truman Show, The Lego Movie, The Matrix, and even The Hunger Games. You are preaching the Gnostic version of faith!
   The Mandela effect was hinted at in the first Matrix film when Neo beholds the same cat cross the room twice in a row, deja' vu -like, and is told by his mentor, "That means they're changing something". Listen people, Satan does not have the power to re-arrange reality, not through sorcery, nor through technology. He can't move mountains- believers can!- and he didn't move the continents. And he certainly cannot change what God has said.
   We are not living in an artificial snow-globe built by some evil elf who wants to control us. We are living on a real planet formed by a loving God Who wants to save and heal us. When the disciples passed by the fig tree Christ cursed and saw it dried up from the roots, it wasn't CERN or the Mandela Effect that changed it.  It was faith. 
   So, which will you live by? By faith, believing what you don't see, or by anti-faith, not believing what you do see?
   Thanks to the real truthers out there who are exposing the lies and standing up for the Truth!
And the truth is the same message you've heard all along- it hasn't changed and won't ever change: God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life.
Until next time, Peace.

Saturday, June 11, 2016

Bits & Pieces

   All the citizens and visitors of ancient Athens spent their time  in nothing else, but either to tell, or to hear, some new thing, according to St. Luke in Acts 17:21. Well the internet is like my own little Mars Hill right now, so I'm just going to share a few things that have been running around in my brain....

The Antichrist Conspiracy
   Do you believe in conspiracies? Well, King David did, and so did the Apostle Peter! For both these main figures of the Old and New Testaments tell us, The kings of the earth set themselves, and the rulers take counsel together, against the LORD, and against His Anointed, saying, "Let us break their bands asunder, and cast away their cords from us." Sounds like a conspiracy to me! Pretty ambitious one, at that! Yes, this was partly fulfilled in Jesus' arrest and crucifixion; but the kings and rulers of the world still don't want God and the Bible telling them what they can and can't do.
   Aren't conspiracy theorists crazy? Well for a teen-ager with no miltary experience to take on a giant who's been fighting his whole life single-handedly, or for an old fisherman to step out of his boat in the middle of a storm at sea to walk on the water is kinda crazy...MY kinda crazy! 
   See the kings and world rulers got themselves a new plan to overthrow God and Christ with a little help from their "alien" friends. More on them in a minute. But pretty much everything coming at you in the media means to turn you away that old-time religion and into a new paradigm. More on that in a minute, too!
The Truth About UFO's
   Well ol' Hillary Rodham Clinton has vowed that, if elected President, she will reveal the truth about UFO's & aliens. (Can't wait for that!) Now you all know I'm not a political anything, but to me a statement like that only confirms the public's suspicion of a government cover-up. What "truth" will she tell? That it was all swamp gas and secret test planes?
   It wouldn't surprise me one iota if she came out and declared the "truth" History Channel's Ancient Aliens has been pushing that the damn aliens created us and they are our gods. She could give a speech like Aaron and Rehoboam did with the golden calves: These be thy gods, America!  
Wired
Know what's weird (other than Hillary telling the truth)? There's a push on by mega-corporations to get everybody indulging in the media like, 24/7. Not long ago, a major wireless carrier was offering to waive its customers' data usage charges as long as they used that data for binge-watching TV shows. Now why would they give up a small fortune like that? What's in it for them?
   A major automaker also announced in its ads, that its new vehicles come with enough wi-fi hotspot power to let seven kids play Plants vs, Zombies at once! Why do they want your kids playing video games in your minivan instead of coloring or singing, or, God forbid, looking out the windows at the scenery? What's in it for them?
   Why are they rewarding us for using the internet??? WHY do they want our every idle moment filled with taking in the media's message? The Bible enjoins us, "Finally my brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely,  whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."  (Philippians 4:8) Then why do I wanna fill my head with a constant barrage of movies, shows, and songs that are just the opposite?
Generation F
   I remember back in the '80's my Dad saying, "Instead of getting smarter, people are getting dumber and dumber!" If he could see us now! Were not this the most ignorant, Biblically illiterate generation America had ever seen, nonsense like the Flat Earth model and the Mandela Effect would go nowhere. No one would fall for such foolishness if they had any foundation in Scripture, geography, and history. Not to mention logic.
   This generation can't tell real news from satire. They can't tell fact from fantasy! Ironic, because with the world wide web, they basically have the sum total of man's knowledge literally at their fingertips! Yet they can't find New York state on a U.S. map!
   There are idiots on YouTube (or, perhaps schills) saying such utter garbage as, "Dinosaurs never existed" "The sun is only 3,000 miles away" "Planets don't exist" and other denials of established facts I wouldn't even say jokingly! And people believe this guff! But then, they also believe Hillary tells the truth. It's scary! Homer Simpson is our leading Prophet! How is that even possible?
   I give this generation an F!

 The world today is in a sad state of affairs. We are hypnotized and programmed to believe and to do whatever we are told.  I am glad I was born  in a time when there was just one TV in the house, and if you missed your show you had to wait until next week. You couldn't take it with you to watch anytime, anywhere. The light of the body is the eye, and if the eye is filled with darkness, how great is that darkness!

   Who wants us all fat, dumb, and happy? And why? Think about it.
'til next time, Peace.


Saturday, June 4, 2016

Mandela Effect: Reality, or Illusion?

"Forever, O LORD, Thy word is settled in Heaven."  (Psalm119:89)
   You know, it grieves me that I have to take time to write about stupid stuff, instead of preaching the unsearchable riches of Christ. But, as my blog is about the Church, the World and the times- and we're living in stupid times- well, there ya go. So what is this so-called Mandela Effect? In a nutshell it says things ain't the way we remember them, therefore the things changed.  No, I kid you not.
    As an example, everyone thinks Humphrey Bogart said, "Play it again, Sam!"  in Casablanca. Well, if you go back and watch, he really said something along the lines of, "Whatever you played for her, PLAY FOR ME!" (just a paraphrase.) SO....the theory goes that Bogey really did say "Play it again, Sam" like we all remember, but books and maps and movies and the like are being changed by the power of CERN, the notorious particle accelerator super collider thingey. No, really: I don't make this up!
   Now, good ol' Occam's razor holds that, all things being equal, the simplest explanation is probably or usually the right one. Sure, there could be a complex, convoluted chain of events leading up to an occurence, but generally speaking, the simplest explanation is our go-to. In the above example, it's merely a case of Bogart impersonators flubbing the line, and their rendition of the scene is what sticks in our minds. Case closed. Right?
    The plot thickens. Some suggest that evil CERN has even changed our Bibles! One claim is that CERN changed Isaiah 11:6 from "lion & lamb" to "wolf and lamb" Well, I've been reading & studying the Word of God since the mid-'70's, and it's always said wolf. 
   In the KJV, Isaiah's prophecy of the Millenial Kingdom goes like this:
"The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid, and the calf, and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them" Isaiah 11:6
   Then why, in the public's memory did the prophecy say the lion and the lamb ?
   Simple. In 1937, when Big Band leader Tommy Dorsey wrote (There'll be) Peace in the Valley, he summarized Isaiah's prophecy of Christ's kingdom this way: 
Well the bear will be gentle, and the wolves will be tame, and the lion shall lie down by the lamb and the beasts of the wild shall be led by a child...
Nothing changed the Bible! Tommy Dorsey reworded the prophecy to fit his melody, and that's the way most people remember it. In fact, setting God's word to music in order to teach is encouraged in the Bible itself (Colossians 3:16)! Nothing sinister or Twilight Zoney about it.
   Your memory is very fluid- there's a reason we have this phrase in our vernacular: "if memory serves me correctly"......cuz a lot of times it doesn't! Memories can easily be changed. Insurance investigators learned back in the fifites that a witness's memory of an accident could be subtly altered just by the way the interviewer phrased a question.
  It looks like this: I see a Dodge hit a Nissan. Now the agents from the drivers' insurance companies chat with me to learn what happened.
 Gecko: And em, at what speed would you say the cars were moving when they rolled into each other?
 Me: I dunno; maybe 25-30 mph?
Gecko: Excellent, Mate! And did you chance to notice if there was a broken headlight?
Me: No...I don't think so...
Now the other car's agent.
Flo: So how fast were the cars going when they smashed into each other?
Me: Oh! at least 45 or 50!
Flo: And didja see the broken headlight?
Me: Now that you mention it, there WAS a broken headlight!
 Hello! Why did my testimony change? Did Big,Bad CERN re-arrange the accident? Why did I tell the lizard one thing and the wacky lady something else? It's that Flo planted a thought in my mind when she said the broken headlight. And my estimate of the speed was influenced by her use of the word smashed. Psychologists know this. Advertisers know it, politicians know it, lawyers know it. Memories are not indelble.
 What if I told you the very first case of the Mandela Effect happened right there in your Bible, back in the Garden of Eden? Watch closely, Ladies & Gents!
And the LORD God took the man,and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.  And the Lord God commanded the man saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil , thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die....
Fast forward awhile later, when the serpent stops by and asks Eve, "Yeah, has God said, 'Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden'?"  And the woman said unto the serpent, "We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden: But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, ' Ye shall not eat of it neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die'."
   Oh, and just how do take care of a garden without touching the plants? Did God say they couldn't even touch it? How 's Adam supposed to trim it or prune the tree without touching it?Where'd she get that from? She didn't hear it from God 'cuz she was just a rib when God set the boundaries. Maybe her dumb husband explained the rules wrong?
   Or did the serpent confuse her with a carefully crafted question? Hey, um, didn't God say you can't eat from any of the trees in the garden? He knew God didn't say that. He's planting a thought in her mind that God doesn't want her to have good stuff.  Literally the oldest trick in the Book! She took it and ran with it, and in her memory embellished  just a little. So you see we've been doing this straight from The Beginning!
 It wasn't CERN, it was the SERpeNt messing with her mind. Things are different from the way we remember because when we don't remember we adlib. "Or has time re-written every line?" like the song says. The Mandela Effect could really be called the Eve Effect.
   Reality didn't change. Our memories merged with our imagination. And God's Word never changes. CERN isn't changing anything or opening up parallel universes. Don't believe everything you hear. Or think you heard.
Peace.

Tuesday, March 22, 2016

Flat Out Lie

   "What is Truth?" Pilate sarcastically asked Christ. "Yer lookin' at It!" Jesus might have replied if He thought for a second ol' Pontius really wanted to know.  Well I'll tell you what truth ain't: it's not relative, not subjective, and BTW, it's not new.   There's some stuff blowing around in the Truth Movement that really doesn't belong there. Not everything they say is true!
   Let's pretend there was an ongoing war between the Vampires and the Werewolves. The Vamps are tired of losing battles and unlives, so they come up with this plan, see. They send one of their own, Joe Tooth, to pose as a Werewolf and join their ranks. He looks like a wolf, walks like one, talks like one. But he's a Vampire through & through. Once in with the wolves, he starts talkin' up a storm against the Bats, like he's their biggest opponent. He quickly rises up through the ranks and soon becomes Leader of the Pack. Now that he's in charge, Joe leads and teaches the Werewolves to do stupid things that are bad for them, like swallowing silver bullets. In this way, the Vampires overcome the Werewolves.
   ***This is exactly what the forces of Antichrist have done with the Church.***
   Since Jesus Christ is The Truth, it only follows that the spirit of anti-Christ should also be the spirit of anti-truth. And so, my friends, like our werewolves, the Truthers have been infiltrated with Liars. It only takes a few to get in and start something stupid, then other Truthers pick it up and run with it!
   Case in point: the Flat Earth myth. My Philosophy teacher in college told us, "Lies are like grapes: they come in bunches." meaning after you tell one lie, you have to keep telling others to cover it up. Flat Earthers are like this. Point out we know there really is a South Pole 'cuz people have been there, and they'll take the explorers' words and twist them around. They say planets don't exist, and satellites are a hoax. Yeah, everybody's lying to you except them. 
   I could talk to you about Ptolemy, Copernicus, and Foucault. I could point out it was our old friends the RCC who tried to slience Gallileo and the Heliocentrists, just like they tried to stop Martin Luther and the Reformers from preaching the glorious gospel of salvation by grace through faith! But let me tell you, one thing these liars are counting on and are confident in is that the Bible doesn't say anything, or else says the earth is flat.
    They're hoping either God was stupid enough to leave Himself without a witness, or else we'd be too dumb to find it. Maybe you're like me and know in your heart the Bible's go to say something to prove these jerks wrong. 
   Remember when the LORD put Job in the hotseat and challenged him with all these questions about science & nature? One thing He demanded was what makes day & night?
(Job 38)Job couldn't answer, (and neither can any Flat Earther) because his generation had the wrong model of the universe.
   But more to the point, God speaks through Jeremiah the prophet, "Thus saith the Lord; if heaven above can be measured, and the foundations of the earth searched out beneath, I will also cast off all the seed of Israel for all that they have done, saith the Lord."  The Geocentric model puts sun, moon, and stars in a dome above a disc shaped earth. Calculating the size of a finite heaven like that is a piece of cake! (Allegedly the Sun is a mere 3,000 miles away.) And those foundations? Just head down to the Antarctic rim, and climb down over the edge!
    But in the Heliocentric model, the universe is virtually infinite! Astrophysicists' estimates of its size are revised often! And good luck getting down into the core of the earth! Jeremiah 31:37's implied absurdity of measuring the heavens or locating earth's foundation just fits better with the universe we were taught in school.
   Not everyone is lying to us, Church! But some people want us to look stupid and superstitious. For who would believe we have the Truth about spiritual things if we talk nonsense about natural things? I beseech you, please don't jump on this Flat Earth bandwagon as many churches already have. With the pre-Tribulation Rapture Theory, the Sister Act worldly-music-in -the-Sanctuary move, and the LGBT "love is love" morality, haven't we accepted enough lies?

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

The Work of Deception

   We live in a world of lies. Many we recognize, others delude us.  Some apparel chains were found to be lowering the posted waist sizes of jeans, to make shoppers think they fit into smaller clothes; a postitve reinforcement to keep us buying their brand! Political ads, memes, infomercials, tabloids, and websites all inundate us with innuendo, half-truths, and outright falsehood. Today Dr. Oz warns you not to eat this food, which causes all kinds of maladies; next week he advises you to eat that same food everyday as it is a miracle cure for all your woes!
   King Solomon observed, "The simple man believeth every word, but the prudent man looketh well to his going" in Proverbs 14:15, and in 14:7 counsels us, "Go from the presence of a foolish man when thou perceivest not in him the lips of knowledge". In other words, stay away from people who don't know what they're talking about.  Some people lie intentionally, others merely regurgitate lies they've been fed and believed.
   I might have titled this piece The Art of Deception but for the fact that deception doesn't require any special skill. Often just affirming something like you believe it yourself is enough to convince some people! It's almost as if we're hardwired to be deceived; it is far easier to get someone to believe a lie than it is to convince him of the truth. P.T. Barnum is credited with the axiom there's a sucker born every minute. The birth rate is probably much higher!
   My friends, deception, delusion, brainwashing, and hypnotizing are far easier than you imagine. Advertisers, record and movie producers, the press,  and the politicians all know how your mind works, and they know how to keep it from working.  I began years ago, studying the major cults and learning of their recruitment and indoctrination techniques. Later I realized others such as political parties, columnists, advertisers...anyone in the field of persuasion-- used the same kinds of methods.
   Do you know why sponsors pay $5 million for a one-minute ad during the Super Bowl? "'Cuz millions of viewers are watching."  YES: millions of viewers who are emotionally charged cheering for their team, stuffing their faces with comfort food safe in the company of family and friends! We're in the ideal state of mind to be deceived.
    Here's how it works. They shut off the frontal lobe of your brain where reason and judgement dwell, and turn on the limbic system where your feelings and passions rule. How? They stimulate you with sex; humor; music; or shock.  Any one of these stops you thinkin' and gets you feelin'.  So they can slip past your logic filters and get right into your heart. Images, emotions, music, and symbols all can have this affect.
   As I pointed out last time, another way to get you to believe in lies is to cause you to mistrust someone else.  If they can get you to accept everyone else has lied to you, you will be more open to their message. Again I say to you, think critically. Don't watch TV passively. They are preaching you a sermon through dramas, comedies, news, and entertainment. Even kids' cartoons are preaching lies.
   Don't be fooled.

Saturday, January 23, 2016

It Must be True, It was on the Internet!

   We've been strolling through Jesus' Messages to  the Seven Churches, and have one more villian from His  Biblical Rogues' Gallery to look at, but before we do, I need to address another issue. Christ doesn't specifically mention it in Revelation 2-3, but the Apostles, particularly Paul, bring it up in several epistles. That is, PEOPLE SAYING STUPID THINGS!
   To wit: "...some having swerved, have turn aside unto vain jangling; desiring to be teachers of the law, understanding neither what they say, nor whereof they affirm." from 1 Timothy 1:6-7, and from Titus 1:10-11, "For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers....whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake."  And it's the same way today, people saying all kinds of stupid things, not knowing what they're talking about nor why they're saying it!
   Don't get me wrong;  I'm all for freedom of speech! Bloggers, redditors, Youtubers, you all have the right to say whatever you want; but with that also comes the responsibility to check your facts and present as honest and accurate information as possible! I regret to state, the Truth Movement,  it seems, has quickly deteriorated and devolved into the Groundless Rumour and Wild Speculation Movement. One lady told me, "Don't access any Youtube video with the word 'truth' in the title; they're all completely insane!" This is unfortunate, cuz if some honest, diligent investigator should uncover the truth, no one will take him seriously!
   The Scriptures foretell the mindset of our generation in 2 Timothy 4:3-4 this way: "For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears; and they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables."
   I'm seeing this every day, as people and even churches go teaching and preaching such nonsense as the Flat Earth and Geocentric Solar System models, and the belief in  Aliens among us. Would to God the Lord's people would learn to think critically! The Bible doesn't enjoin us to check our brains at the church door, brethren!
    Hear what the Scriptures say: " Brethren, be not children in understanding: howbeit in malice be ye children, but in understanding be men"  (1 Corinthians 14:20) There is a place for child-like faith, but there is also a place for man-sized understanding! Yes, Proverbs says don't lean on your understanding, but he never says not to use it at all! Paul told the Thessalonicans, " Prove all things; hold fast that which is good"  which implies, let go that which is junk! (1 Th 5:21)
   When you see an ad, or a meme, watch a show or a video, listen to a song or read an article, think about what they are telling you! Weigh their words, examine their logic, check their facts! Don't be swayed by images and emotions; don't mistrust authority to the point where you believe anyone claiming a government cover-up!
   If I were a Superintendant of Schools, I would insist that reason & logic be taught no later than the sixth grade! Solomon reminds us, "The simple believeth every word, but the prudent man looketh well to his going." (Proverbs 14:15) Don't just jump on any band-wagon that comes up the pike, folks! Not everyone claiming to tell you the Truth really is! "And many shall follow their pernicious ways, by reason of whom the way of TRUTH shall be evil spoken of..."  warns the Apostle Peter (2 Pe 2:2). Stupid talkers give the TRUTH a bad name!
   If I could teach the people of this generation just one principle of logic & reasoning, it would be this: EXTRAORDINARY CLAIMS REQUIRE EXTRAORDINARY PROOF!  A blurry photogragh, the testimony of a sole eyewitness, the confessions of one claiming to be a NASA scientist or Pentagon insider, tabloid articles and fudged statistics are NOT extraordinary proof! Don't believe every word, especially from those trying to tell you everyone has been lying to you your whole life. That's a cue that they're about to lie to you!
   Bottom line, don't say stupid things, don't believe stupid things, don't repeat stupid things: refute stupid things. Peace!
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(in your dreams)

Monday, January 11, 2016

Let No Man Take Thy Crown

  "Hold fast that which thou hast, that no man take thy crown."
   Thus counselled Christ His church at Philadelphia in Asia (Revelation 3:11) I was writing last time about the Nicolaitans, those believers who, rather than building up the faith of the children of God, they tear it down either by their doctrine (Rev 2:15) or by their deeds (2:6).
It is a sad thing indeed to see the man or woman of God, on fire for the Lord, full of the Holy Ghost, and zealous of good works, to be shot down in the faith by another Christian who doesn't recognize that disciple's calling or anointing!
 I have seen it too many times, in too many places. Someone receives a vision and calling for a ministry, and is all excited about it; yet when they go to their elders, or peers, they get slapped down with "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!". Believers can get discouraged when their gift is not received or acknowledged by others, and may hide their light under a bucket rather than face the rejection.
   And I want to say to anyone who's been there, who's gone through that, who's been shut down by others: don't give up! I've been through it myself, as has pretty much anyone who's ever done anything for the Lord. Hold on tight to what you have! If you have tested the spirits, and know in your heart God has truly spoken to you as to how He would have you serve Him, hold fast the vision, and let no one take your crown!
   Joseph's brothers couldn't see God's plan for him, and in their jealousy and resentment, they sold him into slavery. But he remained faithful even when falsely accused and imprisoned. We are told in Psalm 105:19 Joseph was in chains "...until the time that his word came; the word of the Lord tried him".  Jesus' own brothers & sisters thought He was whacked and tried to stop Him. (John 7:5) Jesus answered, "My time is not yet come."
   So I want to encourage you today, who have been so treated by other believers, maybe even your own Pastor: hold onto the vision. The rejection is part of your preparation! Maybe the time isn't now; continue to build up yourself in faith, study to show yourself approved, forgive those who mistreated you. God is faithful, and the work that He began in you, He will continue until the day of Christ. Remember, the gifts and callings of God are without repentance. He doesn't change His mind!
   If you haven't been given the green light by your Pastor to begin your ministry, stay faithful. If the call is genuinely from God, He will move on the Pastor's heart. Be faithful in the little things, and you will be trusted with big things. "That good thing which was committed unto thee keep by the Holy Ghost which dwelleth in us." wrote Paul to Timothy .
 Some who have been slapped down may stop attending church, or backslide even further; don't let that happen to you. Let no one take your crown!

Saturday, January 2, 2016

Dirty Deeds, Done Dirt Cheap!

   "But this thou hast, that thou hatest the deeds of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate", Jesus commends the church of Ephesus in Revelation 2:6. So, who are these Nicolaitans, and just what are their dirty deeds, hated by both the Ephesian church and Christ Himself? You won't find much mention of them, except that they hung out in Pergamos, where Jesus hates their doctrine as well as their deeds. Historically, there was no sect or cult that went by that name, though some link them to "Nicolas, a proselyte of Antioch", one of the seven men of God chosen to be deacons in Acts 6:5.
   Literally, nicolaitans means, "those who overthrow the people (laity)" and conveys the notion of church leaders running things a little too tightly, pontificating as it were, and dominating the people's spiritual lives. Where I'm going with this, (and forgive me if this isn't exactly what the Lord had in mind) is with guys like Hymenaeus and Philetus, "who concerning the truth have erred, saying that the resurrection is past already, and overthrow the faith of some."  (2 Timothy 2:17-18) These are teachers and preachers who crush the believers' faith!
   There be those today who fervently deny the literal six-day Creation and teach evolution instead (Pat Robertson, even!). Other churches declare the gifts of the Spirit are not for today, but passed when the last Apostle died, or when the final book of the Bible was written. Still others insist women cannot teach nor preach, or those who have divorced cannot serve in the ministry. And in this way they overthrow the faith of some, and stifle the move of God in their church! I've been in churches that don't wanna know nuthin'  about the Holy Spirit Baptism, nor of spiritual warfare, nor divine healing. [I didn't stay long.]
   One of the things that grieves me to no end, is when a young believer, on fire for the Lord, and full of faith, starts to minister in the power of God and gets shut down by the Pastor or others. It breaks my heart and burns me up! I HATE IT!!!
   Even Joshua, in his early days, fell into this Nicolaitan spirit. We read in Numbers 11 how God anointed men to ease Moses' burden, then this happened: "but there remained two of the men in the camp, the name of one was Eldad, and the name of the other Medad: and the Spirit rested upon them; and they were of them that were written, but went not out to the tabernacle; and they prophesied in the camp. And there ran a young man, and told Moses, and said, 'Eldad and Medad do prophesy in the camp.' And Joshua, the son of Nun, the servant of Moses, one of his young men, answered and said, 'My lord Moses, forbid them'" But Moses was like, "I wish EVERBODY had the Holy Ghost!"
   Again, John and some of the Apostles did the same thing when this dude was casting out devils in Jesus' name (Mark 9:38-39), but Christ told them to leave the kid alone and let him minister. The best known case of this Nicolaitanism happened when King Saul heard the ladies singing, "Saul has killed his thousands, and David his ten thousands!"  He didn't just discourage David, he actually tried to kill him! (1 Samuel 18:7-8) Another example from the New Testament is Diotrophes "who loves to have the preeminence among them, and receiveth us not. Wherefore, if I come, I will remember his deeds which he doeth, prating against us with malicious words: and not content therewith, neither doth he himself receive the brethren, and forbiddeth them that would, and casteth them out of the church!" (3 John 9-10) .
   This guy was a piece of work! And we start to see the mindset behind it: he wanted to be the BIGSHOT. Other passages we looked at mention envy as the motivation for this kind of activity. And it's sad. You know, the intercessors are praying for God to move in the church, and when He raises someone up, the insecure bigshots shut him or her down! The brother or sister who comes to the Pastor with a vision, or calling, or gift, or ministry gets zapped with, "Who do you think YOU are?!" Thus Nicolaitans dump dirty water on the fires of the Spirit.
   I myself was once told, "You are not called to the ministry."
   In the 18th chapter of Acts we're shown how when Apollos came on the scene with limited knowledge of the Gospel, Aquila & Priscilla took him under their wings and taught him. They nurtured him, mentored him. They didn't shut him down, they cranked him up and turned him loose! This is the way it should be, brethren.
   It is so easy to fall into this overthrowing the faith of believers God is raising up! John almost did it; Joshua almost did it. I pray the Lord I never do it to anyone. Many churches are not growing because when the Holy Spirit starts moving they shut it down. Let us search, if we have done this, or are doing this, to cause some to stumble for our own ego's sake. Rather, let us encourage one another more and more as we see the Day approaching.
   And let us repent of our dirty deeds done dirt cheap.
Peace and  love in the Holy Ghost.


The Judge at the Door

   He Who holds the seven stars in His right hand, Who walks among the golden candlesticks, will weigh and judge each church, and hold the church leaders responsible for whatever good, or bad, went on in that church. This is the message I hear as Jesus Christ addresses the Seven Churches in Asia. There are those who believe and teach we shall never see judgement; but Peter tells us "judgement must begin at the house of the Lord" (1 Peter 4:17) Church leaders will be held accountable.
   For what? Not only for what the did, actively, but also for what they allowed, passively. Because what was Jesus' problem with the churches of Pergamos and Thyatira? Read it again: YOU HAVE THEM THERE that hold the doctrine of Balaam; YOU HAVE THEM that hold the doctrine of the Nicolaitans; YOU SUFFER (allow) that woman Jezebel to teach (Revelation 2:14,15,20). It's not that these nasty people charged into the church and took over, but that the "angel" of the church (pastor and elders) accomodated  them. And church leaders today must look around on the sanctuary of the Most High God and see what spiritual vermin we've allowed to set up house!
   "I have said you are gods, and all of you children of the Most High, but you shall die like men, and fall like one of the princes."  declares the LORD in Psalm 82:6-7, chiding them, "How long will ye judge unjustly, and accept the persons of the wicked?"  Are we not admonished in Ephesians 4:27, "Neither give place to the Devil"? Did not Christ give to His people the keys to the Kingdom of Heaven? (Matthew 16:19) Did He not set us as watchmen on the wall, to warn the wicked to turn from his ways? (Ezekiel 3:17-21) Have we fallen asleep at the switch?
   "Take heed unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God" Paul exhorted the Ephesian elders, further warning them to keep an eye out for false teachers rising up in the church.  In Hebrews we are told church leadership watch for our souls, "as they that must give account" (13:17) Not watch how many empty seats are in the back row, or how many minutes over the announcements ran, but to watch for the flocks' souls! 
    Again I say, we believers, both as individuals, and corporately as churches, will be judged, not only for the bad we'll do, but also for the good we don't do.  "Prove it, Matt." OK, hear the words of Jesus Himself in Luke 12:45-47.... "But and if that servant say in his heart, 'My Lord delayeth His coming'; and shall begin to beat the menservants and maidens, and to eat and drink, and to be drunken, the Lord of that servant will come in a day when he looketh not for Him, and at an hour when he is not aware, and will cut him in sunder , and will appoint him his portion with the unbelievers. And that servant, which knew his Lord's will, and prepared not himself, neither did according to His will, shall be beaten with many stripes." 
   "Jesus wouldn't do THAT!"  He says He will. This is serious stuff. folks. Pastors, elders, bishops, deacons, and teachers will be held to a higher standard; for to whom much is given is much required! Leaders of mega-churches and denominations will be examined through Christ's eyes of fire, and their rule will be weighed in the balance!
 The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness (2 Peter 3:9). Therefore we ought to fear the Lord, and clean up our spiritual houses. Don't know about all you, but I probably got some beatin's coming. Get ready, for, as James says, "Behold, the Judge stands at the door!"

NEXT: Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap!